Let’s be honest—who hasn’t felt like a failure at some point? Maybe not a total failure, but perhaps you fell short of a goal, abandoned a new habit, or didn’t follow through on something you committed to. It’s a heavy feeling, isn’t it?
I’ve been there. In fact, I was living there recently. I hadn’t written a newsletter in over a year or blogged in even longer. It wasn’t that I was sitting around doing nothing—I was busy, but I felt irresponsible. I had fallen short in planning, executing, and moving my business forward.
And when you’re feeling like a failure, your thoughts can start to reinforce that belief. For example, I’d see someone else’s newsletter and think, “They’re doing it. Why can’t you get it together?” When someone signed up for my long-dormant newsletter, I’d beat myself up for having nothing to offer them. Even my social media went silent. I wondered, “Who would hire a business that’s not communicating?”
Getting Back on the Horse
Here’s the truth: it’s okay to feel stuck sometimes. Life isn’t about doing everything perfectly. In fact, when did perfection become the goal? Beating ourselves up over shortcomings only piles shame onto the frustration we’re already feeling—and that’s not helpful.
In the organizing world, there’s a saying: “Done is better than perfect.” Perfectionism keeps us stuck. It’s like a weight that holds us down when we try to move forward but convince ourselves that it’s “not good enough.”
Recently, I’ve been focused on reframing my thought life. I’ve been working on breaking up with rejection, over-responsibility, and other unhelpful patterns. It’s not easy, and I don’t have it all figured out, but I’m on the right path. I’ve realized that even one small step forward—even if it’s not the perfect step—is still progress.
Life isn’t about checking every box on a to-do list or arriving at some final destination. It’s about the journey. Sometimes that journey involves rest, waiting, or even moving sideways instead of forward. And that’s okay.
Can You Relate?
Maybe you’re feeling this way about your space. Is your bedroom, kitchen, junk drawer, or basement overwhelming you? Or maybe it’s your schedule, with meetings and responsibilities pulling you in every direction. If so, you’re not alone. Life has shifted for everyone over the past year, and we’re all trying to find balance.
When I found myself stuck, I realized I didn’t need to overhaul my life—I just needed to make a few small changes, starting with how I spoke to myself.
Small Shifts, Big Impact
Here’s what I’m doing differently:
- Celebrating my small wins. As a self-employed person, there’s no boss handing out kudos, so I’ve learned to pat myself on the back.
- Agreeing with the good, not the bad. I’m choosing to focus on my strengths and the positives in my situation.
- Catching negative thoughts. When I notice a critical or self-defeating thought, I challenge it instead of accepting it.
- Speaking positively over myself and my situation.
For example, if I start thinking, “You’re not getting anything done today,” I say out loud, “I am getting things done.” If my pants feel tight and the thought creeps in, “You’re getting fat,” I counter it with, “I made a great choice by eating that salad on Tuesday. That’s good for my health!”
Even if the positive statement doesn’t feel true yet, saying it helps create its truth.
You Can Do It
I’m not here to give you five steps to climb out of a rut. My advice is simpler: just do one thing. Start by tuning in to your negative self-talk and speaking the opposite. When you catch yourself thinking or saying something negative, stop and reframe it into a positive.
Don’t worry if the positive statement feels far from reality right now. You’re laying the foundation for change, and that’s how it starts.
Making Adjustments
If something isn’t working over time, it might be time for a change. That’s okay, too. We always have choices. For example, I realized my newsletter wasn’t serving me or my audience, so I decided to let it go. Instead, I’m focusing on blogging and alerting readers when new posts go live. If this doesn’t work, I’ll adjust again. It’s all part of the process.
Reframing Success
So, am I failing? No. Let’s reframe: I’m learning and growing every day. I’m exactly where I need to be. I’m not doing this perfectly, but I’m showing up, taking small steps, and seeing positive results.
And you can, too. Start small. Speak life into your situation. Celebrate the wins, no matter how tiny. You’ve got this. Thanks for reading—I’m rooting for you!
